Six + Me

The first few days of deployment with 6 kids

“I miss Daddy,” say our youngest babies, six and four years old. They don’t really comprehend there are about 300 more days to go. Within a few days span, it’s been a lot of figuring out a routine that works. When my husband leaves for funeral detail, TDY, or whatever the government needs him for, I get into a nose-to-the-grindstone mode. I become hyper focused on planning everything; chore schedule, meal planning, gym schedule, new work schedule, laundry schedule, etc. I really feel it’s the only way to survive. With this many kiddos, it’s a must for me.
There are so many “firsts” this go around. Let’s start at the top. I am stepmom to three teenage girls. This will be their first holiday season without one of their bio parents. I’m sure they’re feeling weird about it. Or it could be that I am. We’ve spent 6 holiday seasons together now, but never without a biological buffer. Our oldest also now has a boyfriend. She’s 17 and I’m glad that I never had to cross that bridge until now. We gon’ pray, y’all. My son has been diagnosed with ADHD. He’s nine years old and man, those pre-teen years are showing in a smorgasbord of emotions. So. Many. Firsts. For me, as a parent and stepmom, and for these kids.
Picture it, Tornado Alley, 2022: I’m outside washing both cars because they’re filthy while corraling my little ones nearby. Our 14-year-old meets a friend to go fundraising around the neighborhood. The dogs, Lola (coonhound), and Lucy (beagle) were howling nonstop at the neighbor’s dog insisting on playing in the water I was spraying on the car. I had to stop and get these animals kenneled before I started getting complaints. After finishing up the cars, it was time to decorate the front yard for Halloween. My littles were so excited to help! All was merry, and crash. I hear glass break inside and I bolt inside. You see, my son, disappears into his imagination of all his favorite universes combined. I often him watch storm around the house exploding and conquering all his villains. Welp, he swung at a bad guy and caught a hurricane glass vase.
He was so scared. He saw me and thought he was in trouble. I corralled him and his sisters to the kitchen table for some deep breathing. My main concern was that his hand wasn’t sliced open. Check. No blood. I get to cleaning the glass up in a panic not to have anyone step on it on carpet, and I get a phone call, “Miss Raquel, can Lily come over and hang out?” I’d already said no to hanging out prior and I snapped. I should not have. All the disruption came to a boiling point and I knew it was time to bring myself back down.
Thankfully, that morning’s sermon was a reminder that not everything is on my shoulders. Psalm 46. Go check it out and before you read it, ask God to speak something to you. What He spoke to me was, “I’m right here. I’ve tested you with far more difficult to prepare you for this. Look at all I have moved and done for this family. I. Am. Right. Here.”